Monday 17 December 2007

Becoming overwhelmed about key disapointments / events in life


Whenever an event happens that is generally negative, what may happen is that we get overwhelmed for a period afterwards.

This event could be as diverse as the loss of a job, being conned in a business deal or being emotionally or physically abused. It could go further such as violence, the breakup of a relationship or being deprived of being around ones loved ones etc.

So whenever a reminder of that event occurs, such as meeting or talking to an old friend, that is connected in some way to the event. Or seeing children in the street or two lovers kissing. These things can trigger off a series of emotions that leave us overwhelmed.

What often happens once the first trigger is fired is that we get "activated" and we then fire all sorts of triggers in our minds to create our own overwhelm. This is like a domino effect and only causes to magnify the emotion.

This can be any emotion but includes such feelings as a sense of loss, humilation or victim type thoughts.

Its amazing how one external trigger can have all this power over us.


How do we get past all of this ?

My thoughts about how to stop all this from happening are to intercept every stage of the process:
  • intercept for primary triggers
  • intercepts for secondary triggers
  • intercepts for erroneous negative thought and feeling patterns
How do we create these intercepts:
  • we identify the triggers by writing them done and cataloguing them
  • we identify the thoughts and feelings and stories that we play and write them down
After writing down the intercepts what we need to do is reprogramme our responses, there are a number of ways to do this
  • NLP
  • restating and living into new possibilities

Sunday 16 December 2007

Posting on being a victim

Ok, I'm coming back to this blog.

I'm in victim mode again today and what I believe is the more I think of being a victim the more I am. I could analyse and get more information about this and about my interactions with all these people / situations that I have been a victim around.

Ok so not only am i thinking this its got me and my head is a confused muddle, can you make sense of the action in the above paragraph. It's just a stab at solving the problem, not a very considered and grounded stab. Really, I've just been in a sort of desperate fix it mode.

Now ..so lets clear..
  1. I am not in the past, i'm not the future, I'm just in the present.
  2. i am only a victim because I allow it
  3. I need to work on the triggers and how i get activated into this confused state
  4. it will prob be very difficult and very emotional to work through all of this in one go i.e: work through all the transactions that make this happen, so...work on each person ... one at a time
  5. I need to acknowledge that ... I am scared of myself and how I will confront these transactions knowing what i know. I am essentially afraid of triggering myself in these situations and therefore in avoidence of various situations and people
  6. I could do with coping mechanisms and tactics for (5)
  7. I could do with grounding myself with stronger roots for (5)
  8. I will get very strong very soon, I am the rock
Ok
  1. I need to work on the triggers and how i get activated into this confused state
  2. Do a little every day on transactions and people
  3. Work and develop strategies, coping and reprogramming for this
  4. Keep a victim journal
  5. listen to wayne dyers "Pulling Your Own Strings"


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